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Discover skills to resolve touchy, controversial, and complex issues at work and at home--now available in this follow-up to the internationally popular Crucial Conversations.

Behind the problems that routinely plague organizations and families, you'll find individuals who are either unwilling or unable to deal with failed promises. 　　　Others have broken rules, missed deadlines, failed to live up to commitments, or just plain behaved badly--and nobody steps up to the issue. Or they do, but do a lousy job and create a whole new set of problems. Accountability suffers and new problems spring up. New research demonstrates that these disappointments aren't just irritating, they're costly--sapping organizational performance by twenty to fifty percent and accounting for up to ninety percent of divorces.

Crucial Confrontations teaches skills drawn from 10,000 hours of real-life 　　　　observations to increase confidence in facing issues like:

An employee speaks to you in an insulting tone that crosses the line between sarcasm and insubordination. Now what?

Your boss just committed you to a deadline you know you can't meet--and not-so-subtly hinted he doesn't want to hear complaints about it.

Your son walks through the door sporting colorful new body art that raises your blood pressure by forty points. Speak now, pay later.

An accountant wonders how to step up to a client who is violating the law. Can you spell unemployment?

Family members fret over how to tell granddad that he should no longer drive his car. This is going to get ugly.

A nurse worries about what to say to an abusive physician. She quickly remembers "how things work around here" and decides not to say anything.

Everyone knows how to run for cover, or if adequately provoked, step up to these confrontations in a way that causes a real ruckus. That we have down pat. Crucial Confrontations teaches you how to deal with violated expectations in a way that solves the problem at hand, and doesn't harm the relationship--and in fact, even strengthens it.

Foreword xiii

Preface xvii

Acknowledgments xviii

Introduction: What's a Crucial Confrontation?

　And Who Cares?

Part One: Work on Me First

What to Do before a　Crucial Confrontation

Ch. 1: Choose What and If

　How to Know What Crucial Confrontation to Hold and If You Should Hold It

Ch. 2: Master My Stories

　How to Get Your Head Right before Opening Your Mouth

Part Two: Confront with Safety

　What to Do during a Crucial Confrontation

Ch. 3: Describe the Gap

　How to Start a Crucial Confrontation 83

Ch. 4: Make It Motivating

　How to Help Others Want to Take Action 113

Ch. 5: Make It Easy

　tow to Make Keeping Commitments (Almost) Painless

　　Ch. 6: Stay Focused and Flexible

What to Do When Others Get　Sidetracked, Scream, or Sulk

Part Three: Move to Action

　What to Do after a Crucial Confrontation

Ch. 7: Agree on a Plan and Follow Up

　How to Gain Commitment and Move to Action

Ch. 8: Put It All Together

　How to Solve Big, Sticky, Complicated Problems

　Ch. 9: The Twelve "Yeah-Buts"

　How to Deal with the Truly Tough

Appendix A: Where Do You Stand? A Self-Assessment for MeasuringYour Crucial Confrontation Skills

Appendix B: Six-Source Diagnostic Questions The Six-Source Model

Appendix C: When Things Go Right

Appendix D: Discussion Questions for Reading Groups

Notes

Index

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作者简介：Kerry Patterson

Kerry Patterson has consulted with hundreds of Fortune 500 companies using his award-winning training program to teach development and maintenance of healthy organizations.